The Complete Katie Interview

KT: I know it's probably hard, but if you could pick out a memory from your time at Wesley, what would be your favorite? I know you probably have several.
BS: Let's see, favorite memories. Okay, I'll name a few and you can pick out one I guess. I remember my freshman year on tour, we sang "Lord, I Lift Your Name on High." Gerritt and I had been trying to get people to clap along with the last chorus where it was a capella and we stopped playing (our band instruments) and everything. We had been trying to get people to clap all along, so in one of the last performances we just started clapping ourselves because we stopped playing and the choir was singing, and then the congregation joined in and the rest of the singers joined in, too. So Glenn was like "Oh. Okay. That's fine." We didn't know if Glenn would get mad at us or not for making people clap. So that was pretty cool that we, we thought..
KT: So y'all were clap-instigators?
BS: Yes. A pretty cool trick on our part. Let's see. What else, what else. (thinking) Man, I've done so many things. I would count meeting Gina and being with her a definite favorite Wesley memory, since we met at Wesley at Singers practice. Also, I don't know if this counts as a Wesley memory, but since we met at Wesley to me it counts: "The Hour that Doesn't Count'. (The hour that repeats itself during the fall when we set our clocks an hour back. While most of you are probably fast asleep in bed, thankful for the extra hour of sleep you get, a group of creative college students is out somewhere doing something completely random and more than likely exceptionally silly. Why you ask? The answer is simple: It's the Hour that doesn't count.) The first two or three of those that we did were pretty cool.
KT: Who started that?
BS: Well Steve and Tom and I were talking about it one time on the first year that we did it. Talked about how the time shifts back and everything, for whatever reason. And I had actually seen an episode of "Pete and Pete," in which the younger Pete plans revenge on the bully during that hour the clocks are set back for daylight's savings time. And then after that, they just do the same hour over again as if nothing happened. So Tom and I were like, "Wouldn't it be crazy if we could just do whatever we want and end up at the exact same place we started at the end of the hour?� And so that's how "The Hour that Doesn't Count" was started.

KT: What was your worst or least favorite Wesley memory?
BS: Well, like I said at Wesley Weekend, getting mono on Tour my freshman year wasn't very fun. But despite that being something that could have turned me away from Wesley, the people on Tour that year that cared for me made me realize that I was in a good place with good people, so it turned into something that kept me coming back for more.

KT: What has been your favorite song as a Wesley Singer or member of the Wesley Band?
BS: Um, I think "Rock of Ages." I was just now listening to the recordings from Wesley Weekend and it's just an awesome song. It's really fun. Last year Gerritt and I probably just had too much fun, kinda making up little dances and choreographing moves within our chairs as we played the songs. And also, "Send Me," from sophomore year. I like that, because Rob Rhyne (2002) was the drummer that year and he did this whole jam at the end and he just went nuts, and I just started going nuts. At the end of every time we did that song, we would just do this huge solo underneath the Singers singing it and the big-Gospel choir "Wooh!" kinda thing.

KT: Who, in your opinion, of the people who will still be at Wesley after you've left, will continue the Bret Salmons Legacy? Not that you can be replaced, because that's just impossible, but who do you think is most like you?
BS: Well, in one aspect JoCo (Jonathan's nickname, courtesy of yours truly!) will be taking over for me on the bass for the band next year. I�m glad first of all that we found somebody that was willing to play music with us, and now we've got someone to fill my shoes in the band. I don't really know about the other stuff. There's no shortage of good people who can step up and fill the officer positions I've had, so that's a good thing. I would just hope that a lot of people would have the same enthusiasm to give back to Wesley as I have.

KT: What do you want to be remembered for?
BS: Um�(there's a few seconds of silence and then--) FOR MY SOUL, BROTHA! FOR MY SOUL!!! It was something James Brown said once (at that point, I'm really glad he explained that because I had no idea what he was talking about) I would say, if you want a serious answer, just that I was a nice guy and that I worked hard, and that's good enough.

KT: If you could give a nickname to your era as the President of Wesley, what would it be?
BS: The Super-Funk Administration.

KT: Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
BS: Um�(he thinks for a few seconds) I will be either selling out Radio City Music Hall for a live acoustic show that will bring back the Wesley Band members for a reunion, or selling my first novel, or having complete control of the Navy. (Editor's Note: Bret was completely joking about the Navy part.)

KT: What's your favorite building on campus?
BS: It'd have to be Burruss. It symbolized Virginia Tech. I saw a lot of good concerts there. It's just kind of like the focal point a lot of people identify with Tech. It symbolizes the power of Virginia Tech I guess.

KT: If you could have any profession other than the one you will be starting up in after graduation, what would it be?
BS: If I could be successful with it and making a clean living off it, I'd be a writer, I think.

KT: What profession would you not want to have?
BS: I would not want to be the guy who has to clean out the lion pit.

KT: When you get to heaven what do you want to hear God say?
BS: I knew you we're going to ask that.
KT: How?
BS: You have asked that to all of our guest speakers so far.
KT: Oh yeah, that�s right. It is my favorite question.
BS: I'd want him to say, "Well, you did your best, so come on in!"

KT: The final question is another one of my favorite questions. I asked Otey during my interview with him last year. You all never let me ask the guest speakers this question, but now I am in complete editorial control. And so I ask you, Bret Adam Salmons, if you were a hot dog and you were starving, would you eat yourself?

BS: Yes, I would.

So would we, Bret. So would we.

The End.